Preparing for childbirth? Try an antenatal class in Spanish

Mine and my husband’s efforts not to reveal the name of our unborn child before delivery may well be in vain. On Friday, we attended our first antenatal class, in Spanish I hasten to add, and the mid-wife not only asked us our names but also the name of our baby. Hang on, after five scans and six and a half months in, the gender still hasn’t been confirmed… affirmatively anyway.

I don’t know how most first-time parents feel when they attend their first antenatal/NCT class but Alistair, my husband, and I weren’t thrilled with the prospect. Firstly, they're on a Friday at 7.30-9pm, just at a time when we'll be trying to ignore the hunger pangs. Secondly, the language. Listening to tips on labour and delivery in Spanish will be great for our audio skills, but maybe not so great in helping us look after our baby when we don’t understand what the mid-wife's saying.

We really hoped that it wouldn’t be a group therapy session, where we all sit round and talk about how we're feeling. It’s bad enough in English. I’m so glad the mid-wife said that Alistair had to come too.     

Parental bonding..?

So off we went to our little clinic, which is pretty much like sitting in someone’s converted lounge but with rows of plastic chairs that no one can get through. Other couples seemed to recognise each other and had already formed a bond. This did unnerve me a bit as that's why many people in the UK go to NCT classes, to meet other parents-to-be. Don't get me wrong, everyone seemed lovely but our limited Spanish may not go as far as talking about contractions.

Luckily, Ceci, the lovely girl who works in administration at the school that my husband teaches at, also turned up with her husband in toe. She beamed at us and shouted out a big hello in English. Her English is far better than my Spanish, but, hey, I’m trying here.

Next, the midwife hands us a checklist of what we’ll need in our hospital bag – ositos, batitas etc – I have no idea what they are but thankfully Ceci does. Mental note to text Ceci later to ask where we can get all this stuff from.

So the topic of discussion for today is caesarean and post-caesarean. Erm I didn’t realise this is what I had opted for. Well apparently, the topics follow a 10-week cycle and we happened to join during topic no.9. Phew, we didn't have to form a circle and hold hands etc; we just watched a powerpoint presentation and drifted off occasionally.

Vow of silence

One interesting thing I did learn was that if one has a caesarean, the mother should not speak for 10 hours until after surgery. I can’t remember why now, but we also learnt some other new words, such as the Spanish word for gauzes. That will certainly come in handy...

I was looking forward to the breathing and relaxation exercises, which the handout said would be during the break, as my back has been hurting lately and I've been finding it hard to nod off. Five minutes to nine and still no sign of a break or any relaxation techniques. 

Instead we had a Q&A session on what to do if your waters break. My guess is that you’d go to the hospital…? So, that was the end of our first session. Next week is paediatrics, I think. Shame, we’re away next weekend. Still, there's nothing like perseverance so maybe I will be shouting obscenities in Spanish come labour. Although I don't think that will be part of our course.